Spicy pronouns

I've been thinking a bit lately about like how we as fun gendery queer types will sometimes sort of let more of our identities be known in some spaces than others. Like, if you're reading this then yes you know I'm Millie and it's short for Millennium and I'm a magnificent beautiful transfemme being who uses she/they pronouns. But like, at work there's a different name I use and my gender nonconformity is more like "nail polish and occasionally eyeliner and clear they/them pronouns in my signature block which I will insist on". And then at various other institutions and legal documents it's like fuck it I'll still use my deadname whatever too much fucking effort.

Anyway, I kinda like the term "spicy pronouns" in terms of explaining this feeling, like my pronouns are they/them but my Spicy Pronouns are she/they. It hopefully conveys the feel of "like yeah that's fine but this is cooler and more awesome but also I'm sure you understand why I'm shy about it" that I experience.

Is this an anxiety / avoiding confrontation thing? Is it a consequence of my gender fluidity? Who knows, let's say both. I Can Do What I Want.